Today I have been doing some reading about self harm and have come across this statistic
‘3 in 10 girls in Europe have self harmed or thought about self harming in the last year’
‘3 in 10 girls in Europe have self harmed or thought about self harming in the last year’
This in some ways didn’t surprise me as I am aware of the problems however it does deeply disturb me that more and more young people (and adults) are turning to self harm to deal with the world in which they live.
What is it about our lives that means that we are unable to cope? Have we not been taught other coping mechanisms? Do people feel they shouldn’t or couldn’t share their feelings with someone else?
Is there such a lack of continuity for our young people in and out of the home that the only release they can find is to harm themselves?
I’m embarking on some new research which will look into the lived experiences of young women and the way in which they view themselves including questions about self harm and eating disorders – this is in the true beginnings so may take a while but watch this space.
If you have experience of self harm or eating disorders or have any comments on my blog or would like to share your experience of any issues to do with self esteem, body image etc I would love to hear from you – Please leave a comment on this page or email me @ beautycocoon@gmail.com. This is not a helpline more a way of keeping in touch with people accessing my blog!
For Now
BC
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Firstly its great you've set this page up BC. I trust it heightens understanding for many, so that we can get to the roots of the difficulties and let people know their worth. Having had personal experience of self harm in my teens, I looked into helath care professionals understanding/views as to why people do self harm for my dissertation at uni. I was shocked to put it mildy and some what offended. Maybe I shouldnt be, and why should I expect people to understand?? Dont get me wrong, Im not slating those in the caring profession, and am fully aware that there are many out there that sympathise and genuinely do undertsand. I just feel that from personal experience, and my research, that so very much more needs to be done to heighten every ones awareness as to what its all about. A lack of understaning from others I feel only drives the difficulties more underground. It drives those away who actually need the most understanding caring ear and friend. In a nutshell from my perspective and experience its not about suicide, its not about wanting to die, its about wanting to survive, its about wanting to cope!! I truely believe that is about taking control of an "out of control" emotional pain and turing it in to some thing physical that you can control yourselves. A translation of a hurt that one cannot sooth into one that can be tended to. No Im not saying people are control freaks!! People who self harm shouldnt have to be living with such emotional pain and torment in the first palce and not one of us can judge them, we dont know, as we're not in their shoes. Having said that I found it to be a kind of punishment to myself also. It takes on many roles. Why do people turn to self harm as a means of coping??? I dont think necessarily that its because we dont posess the coping skills, I think maybe that pain is getting greater in the world. I know many self harm due to sexual abuse/ abuse of any kind. Is this not becoming more common. How are people expected to cope with that? What coping mechanisms are taught us growing up to cope with that? Talking may do some good in helping, but the dirty guilt feeling and lies that your head tells you when you're being abused, rarely will manifest itself in wanting to announce such to anyone, so you deal with it, you convert it into a pain you can manage. Its a deep topic I know, and I am not advocating any self harm in anyway shape or form, but we all need to talk more openly about experiences so taht we can come to an understanding and promote self worth, self esteem, self love, that seems to have been stripped from many. For me I came to a point where I managed to believe that I was bigger than those who had taken from me, that I was loved and that I was precious, as we all so very much are. It takes time to come to that point though, and for me a faith too, but also people to get along side and love you through it. I still had to look at the scars daily, I will always have to wear long sleeve tops for work, I will always have to try and keep my left arm hidden from view, because I dont want that constant reminder of the emotional pain I was in back then, but having said that, as im sure you will hear many say, those scars remind me that I am strong, they remind me that I survived, they remind me, I have self worth!!!
ReplyDeletehey, thanks so much for your comments - they are really insightful - amazing to hear about your recovery - recovery stories can be so uplifting and encouraging to other sufferers - keep in touch
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